May 13, 2007

Dreams - My other reality

(I had wanted a good, nice dream. A dream I could remember in my waking moments and, perhaps, indulge in. Somehow, to be able to remember a dream gives this side of the reality more substance.)

I was with Kay. At the back of a pick-up or some kind of vehicle that had an open top. We were talking, trying to clear up some misunderstanding. At some point in our conversation, she said she still cares about me and she still loves me. I found that believable. And I did believe. Nevertheless, I felt it was all too late. And I expressed that it was too late. I believed her but I couldn't allow myself to treat her as I did. She said she lied. She lied in the email that she sent. She lied about her seeing someone else. I told her I knew it was a lie. But since I also said I'd believe whatever she told me, I had to believe the lie.

She was sorry. For some reason not known, she wanted my help to pretend that we were getting along just fine, in front of her parents. She wanted me to pretend we were OK. Even though her mum must have seen that I was upset. 'Cos she came to me and asked if I was feeling all right.

At that point, I realised I was on a wheelchair. My right leg was injured. Something happened and I was hurt in the right leg. I was wheelchair bound. So, when her mum came and asked if I was all right, I lied that I was upset because of my leg.

Apparently, her parents were coming over to my house to stay over. In my parents' room. With my parents. I realised the room was getting really too crammed. And I did wonder for a bit why would they be coming over to my house to stay for the night? It felt like we were all travel-bound. So, they came over to stay for the night so we could all depart from my house the next morning.

Jasmine's bf was there too. He wanted to watch a basketball match on the TV in my parents' room. So, I told him he couldn't because the room was getting too crammed. And Kay's mum told me she couldn't sleep if there was TV on in the same room. So, I went to talk to Yanxian. I asked him if he could watch the match over the net. I could lend him my laptop. And he didn't seem very happy about it. But agreed, anyway.

xxx

Apple, Kay and me were in Hong Kong. Kay and I shared a room and Apple had one to herself.

It was our first morning in Hong Kong. I woke up early to get breakfast. I walked this long stretch of shops which sold all kinds of breakfast items like steamed cakes, pastries, Chee Cheong Fun. I was in search of egg tarts. Because I remembered Kay said she wanted to eat all the very good egg tarts in Hong Kong. She even said she wouldn't tire of eating it everyday. So, I wanted to know where I could find very good egg tarts.

I went into a shop which sold a lot of steamed cakes and pastries. I asked an aunty there where I could find delicious egg tarts. She told me this shop which was quite a distance away. Her eyes almost lit up while she was telling me. So, I must be very convinced that it was very good egg tarts. Then, I remembered Kynthia once brought me to this tea restaurant in Hong Kong, near where she was staying in Sham Shui Po. And she told me they sold the best egg tarts in Hong Kong and I definitely must try. So, I asked the aunty if that was the one she was referring to. And the aunty said it was exactly that one.

I was really happy. I found very good egg tarts! And I would bring Kay there.

When I got back to the hotel, I went to find Apple. She was not in her room. I didn't know where she was. So, I left the breakfast I bought for her in her room. Then, I went back to the room I was sharing with Kay. She was vacuuming the carpeted floor. I asked why she was awake so early. She asked where did I go. And I just gave a knowing smile.

Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 23:24